yeah

perhaps, i should just forget about him. maybe it's the best thing to do. i mean, i have been waiting and hoping for ten years. and what? nothing.

liza is right. what could have happened is in the past. and i'm sure if it didn't happen before, it will never happen now.

i have done what i thought i needed for closure. i wrote him that letter. and before sending it, i decided that no matter what happens, i will move on and close that chapter in my life, as liza also said.

and yet, here i am, pondering the imponderables...

thine mortals eyes are not meant to see the future. but what will happen if he does attend our reunion?

i wonder.

and now i repeat the spiral.

if only i had been born a genetic girl, then only by then, he would like me for me, love me.

i guess i'm just hoping i could have one of those stories with happy endings...


he was my first, and i wanted him to be my last.

but a dream is a dream is only a dream.





...is it crazy look,i wanna know now
For I to knock some more
In life I know there is lots of grief
But your love is my relief...